Pam is a worrier. She knows she isn’t supposed to, but her underlying insecurity tends to frame every thought or situation in terms of what’s the worst thing that can happen. When people tell her it’s a sin to worry, she just worries more about that. She would like some joy in her life, but after a couple of times being burned or disappointed, she feels the need to protect herself from pain.
Pam is living in the tension of a core conflict. And so is her boss, Alex.
Alex lives his life in pursuit of excellence. Work excellence. Play excellence. Family excellence. Financial excellence. Your excellence if you get close enough. The problem is that everything has to be so excellent that most times nothing is. Because Alex can’t settle for ordinary in anything, he’s haunted by mediocrity in everything.
Alex is living in the tension of a core conflict. And so is his sister, Teri.
Teri is one of the walking wounded. Her life has been a vicious cycle of injury, followed by failure, followed by injury, followed by failure again. It seems that whenever she’s working on forgiving somebody else, she becomes haunted by her own past sins or consequences. These past mistakes and conflicts have left her fearful of trusting and shy of trying anything or anyone new in her life. She knows her version of “playing it safe” is only adding to the sadness. But she’d rather have a sad heart than a seared one.
Teri is living in the tension of a core conflict. And so is her son, Will. [click to continue…]
I know I’m not supposed to worry.
But…
I know I should have more faith in God.
But…
I know this should be an easy, clear decision.
But…
I want to pursue this direction.
But…
I long ago lost count of the number of times a counseling or coaching encounter started there. Here’s what I know. Here’s what I should be. Here’s what I want.
But…
These are the starting points of conversations about something we all encounter – core conflicts. [click to continue…]
Many years ago, a little girl and her dad were walking through the grass on the Canadian prairie. In the distance, they saw a prairie fire; eventually, they realized, it would engulf them.
The father knew there was only one way of escape. He quickly started a fire right where they were and burned a large patch of grass.
When the huge fire drew near, he took his little girl and stood on the section that had already been burned. When the fire actually did approach them, the girl was terrified by the raging flames. But her father assured her, “The flames can’t get to us. We’re standing where the fire has already been!”
There is a fire that Christ-followers face that can seem as frightening. [click to continue…]
by Andy Wood on May 2, 2012
in Consumers, Five LV Laws, Gamblers, Hoarders, LV Alter-egos, Pleasers, Principle of Abundance, Principle of Eternity, Principle of Freedom, Principle of Increase, Principle of Legacy
I have an urgent news flash for you: Just because you know something is wrong, that doesn’t mean you’ll avoid it.
Shocking, I know. And the corollary is also true: Just because you know you’re supposed to do something, that doesn’t mean you’ll do it.
Suppose you could interview Jonah – the Old Testament’s version of Gilligan – and ask him what the most important requirement was for prophets. What do you think he’d say? My guess is that he would tell you that a prophet’s number one job is to speak what he hears the Lord saying to speak.
Why, then, did Jonah have to travel from the boat to the belly to the burp to the beach before he decided to do what his own standard said to do?
Resurrect a first-century Pharisee and ask him what it took to please God, and you’d probably hear something about keeping the law and prophets, serving God and walking in humility and discipline.
Why, then, did Jesus refer to the scribes and Pharisees as unwilling to lift a finger to meet a need, doing all their deeds to be noticed by men, loving the place of honor at banquets and the chief seats in the synagogues, and insisting on being called by respectful titles in public? If serving God faithfully was so important to them, why did the Son of God warn people not to be like them?
Whenever the bad news breaks out about somebody who has shocked us with their oh-no, no-no behavior, we often ask silly questions like, “Well didn’t they know that was wrong?” Of course they did. Why, then, would someone violate their own standards of right and wrong? [click to continue…]
The men who were guarding Jesus began mocking and beating him. They blindfolded him and demanded, “Prophesy! Who hit you?” And they said many other insulting things to him (Luke 22:63-65, NIV).
Making fun.
Something we all do, to ourselves or to somebody else. Sometimes good-natured, sometimes amazingly insensitive.
But here it’s different. Here the “fun” is at the expense of the Son of God, and particularly His very nature. Verse 65 says they were blaspheming.
There is only one reason these men were able to do this – [click to continue…]
Yes, this is me mocking my grandson. Or maybe Cason's mocking me. Hmmm.
Tucked away in the third stanza of a familiar hymn, Fannie Crosby penned these lines that were years ahead of her time:
Down in the human heart, Crushed by the tempter,
Feelings lie buried that grace can restore.
Except for the grace of God, every single one of us will go to our graves feeling guilty about our feelings. Can you relate to any of these?
- “I didn’t love my mother enough.”
- “I hate my father.”
- “I don’t like being a mother.”
- “I will never forgive her as long as I live.”
- “I love one of my children more than the other.”
- “Why can’t he just die?”
One person has said, “Emotions are what we have the most of, and know the least about.” One of the longest, and most frustrating searches that many people have is why do I feel the way I feel, and what can I do about it?
On the other hand, some people (stupidly) dismiss all that and passively allow themselves to be led around by their feelings as if they are helpless to do anything about them. Ever hear something like this? [click to continue…]
You show me Grace in the cases
Where I would be tempted to give up on me.
Yet you see past the walls and the falls to the work of art
Hidden in this cold heart of stone.
You alone have the faith to see what I could be
When You finish the good work You started in me
When You first showed me Grace.
And I’m amazed. And I thank you.
You show me Grace in the places
Where I’m still resisting the changes You make.
So you shake my desire from the mire of my stubborn will –
Patiently waiting till I bend.
You intend only good for me – to flourish, free
From the lifeless and broken man I used to be
When You first showed me Grace.
And I’m amazed. And I thank you.
You show me Grace in the spaces
Between where I should be and where I remain,
With a stain from a past that still casts a dark shadow when
All I can see is sin and shame.
Yet you came to restore the years and store the tears
That I’ve cried in my brokenness, longing and fear
When You first showed me Grace.
And I’m amazed. And I thank you.
You show me Grace in the faces
Of people who touch the untouchable me.
They can see through my blindness, with kindness they lovingly
Call out the best in me to grow.
And You know how I need to feel what You can heal
Through the tangible goodness You chose to reveal
When You first showed me Grace.
And I’m amazed. And I thank you.
You show me Grace in the traces
Of glory that whisper to me of my home.
While I comb through the aches and the breaks of a world that yearns
For the day You return to claim
Those you came to redeem from the grave and captive slaves
Like I was when You found me and paid all to save –
When You first showed me Grace.
And I’m amazed. And I thank you.
It was a new day at Grace Church. A new pastor was coming, and this would be his first weekend. People were excited, and they needed to be. Grace had gone through an ugly split that had left a lot of angry, hurt, and confused people in its wake. A pretty solid plug of people had started Faith Church down the road and had contacted the outgoing pastor from Grace to help them get started. Some people had left for other churches. Some people had quit attending anywhere.
One of the walking wounded was a former associate pastor – Chris Naylor. Chris had received “the right foot of fellowship” from the previous administration. Though he had found other opportunities for Kingdom service, Chris was still a member – at least on paper – at Grace.
That’s why I was a little surprised when I asked Chris and his wife Rachael if they were going to hear the new guy that weekend, and both immediately, categorically said, “No.”
Ooh. Sorry I asked.
“My friends think I’m bitter,” Chris added.
“Are you?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” he replied honesty. “How do you balance the fact that on the one hand I love the church and wish nothing but the best for them, but on the other hand, have absolutely no respect for their system of leadership or the choices they have made?”
“I don’t know.”
Chris was just getting warmed up as Rachael was tearing up. [click to continue…]
Have you ever woken up first thing in the morning and realized you were in a museum?
And you were what was on display?
You may not have recognized the location at first because everything seemed so real. You were traveling through one mental display after another of your past life.
Names.
Faces.
Feelings.
Friends.
Sometimes the scenes are wistful and happy reminders of people and days gone by. Sometimes you’re reliving the glory days. But sometimes it plays out more like a horror movie or a disaster cleanup. It’s ugly – and you’re the reason.
It may be a new day on the outside, but in here you’re trapped in the old ones. [click to continue…]
Way past the appearances and impressions we try to leave,
Behind the masks and attempts to please the critical and excite the vain –
Beyond the insiders’ lingo and bless-to-impress,
There rests a true heart.
Your heart. My heart.
Authentic, insofar as we can know it without being deceived by it.
Wiser, it seems, than we often give it credit for being.
More terrified at times than we would ever let on.
More prayerful than we often realize…
More ruthlessly demanding that we care to admit in polite company.
Gloriously free from what we used to be – yet humbly aware of how far we have to go. [click to continue…]
Pam is a worrier. She knows she isn’t supposed to, but her underlying insecurity tends to frame every thought or situation in terms of what’s the worst thing that can happen. When people tell her it’s a sin to worry, she just worries more about that. She would like some joy in her life, but after a couple of times being burned or disappointed, she feels the need to protect herself from pain.
