Picture a couple of goldfish in a cartoon. Only instead of a fishbowl, they’re holed up in a blender. One looks to the other and says, “The stress here is killing me!”
We had that cartoon at a place I used to work.
We also had that kind of stress. We never quite knew when somebody might show up and punch “Puree.”
Morale was hard to come by in that environment because we presented one set of values to the public, but lived by a different set behind the office doors. Information was available only on a “need to know” basis, and most people, most of the time, didn’t “need to know.” Accountability ran down a one-way street. Underlings were accountable for everything, including their email accounts and their bank accounts, while “leaders” answered to no one.
Thomas Jefferson and James Madison were great friends. Throughout their near-lifelong friendship, as far as we know they never had a problem.
Never had a solution, either.
Friends? Yes. And boring.
Jefferson and John Adams? Boy, was that a different story. One looooong, near-lifelong debate. Fiery exchanges. Icy periods of silence. And one of the warmest, most profound collections of letters in history between these two icons, who died on the same day, 50 years to the day after the Declaration of Independence was signed.
Friends? Oh my, yes. They each had busts of the other in their homes. And Adams, not knowing his friend had already died, departed this life with these words: “Thomas Jefferson still survives.”
That said, let’s be honest. Few of us get up in the morning hoping to cross swords with friends. Or spouses. Or parents or kids or team members or employees or constituents or customers. (Dear Mark: Please call again soon – I promise I’ll be nicer on the recorded line for quality assurance purposes.) And yet the quality of your relationship is measured – not by the lack of conflict, but by how those conflicts are managed and solutions are forged.
I spent 26 years in school. At each level I learned many things. I learned how to read, how to write, how to spell. I learned that Columbus really didn’t discover America, that the South was doomed from the beginning of the Civil War, and that we really don’t know who wrote the book of Hebrews. I learned to parse a verb, to multiply polynomials, and to define “fallacious” and “facetious.” I learned more theories related to leadership than I care to count.
But in spite of all the things I learned, those 26 years failed to teach me four very important things – lessons that can determine my success or failure out in the real world, where bells don’t ring and (true story) traffic lights don’t control the noise in the lunchroom. Let me share them with you – with the understanding, of course, that I’m still learning. Next year’s list could be completely different. [click to continue…]
Dateline Barcelona, 1992. The Summer Olympics are hosting the first-ever competition of the truly-best in their respective nations, as professionals and amateurs are all invited to the party. The United States has assembled a collection of NBA-plus-one stars that may be the best roster to ever take a tip-off. And their nickname: “The Dream Team.”
This isn’t about basketball. It’s about teams, and how you need a “dream team” of your own. Not the kind the wins medals, but the kind that empowers lives. While our culture idolizes the individual, the truth is, you were designed by creation and redesigned by gifts and talents to need the contributions of others in order to maximize your potential. I’d like to show you how to go about doing it. [click to continue…]
Make a list of the most important qualities needed for effective leadership, and let me hazard a guess as to what won’t be on it: Conversation.
Oh, I’m sure you’ll mention communication, but in most people’s imagination, this refers to the ability to move a crowd with speeches, lead a meeting with clarity, and/or write powerfully. And let me hasten to say, I’m for all three of those.
In each of these, a position holder is talking to people in other positions. And that has its place. But the best leaders have a secret weapon that “primes the pump” of their influence: they know how to engage their constituents in ongoing, life-shaping, direction-setting conversations.
They disarm by listening differently.
They empower by asking questions out of sincere curiosity.
They enflame the imagination by telling stories – theirs or somebody else’s.
They forge “joint ventures of the heart” by demonstrating understanding and an ability to be influenced themselves.
And they mobilize by sharing their vision interpersonally, with passion.
And all of this can be done in a few minutes at a time, standing at the water cooler, waiting for the “real” meeting to start, or riding on a bus to the company picnic. [click to continue…]
An interesting op-ed headline appeared in The Chicago Tribune a few days ago. It read, “Govern like a leader, not a politician.” The author, Mike Lawrence, proposed that the current financial mess in Illinois would only be solved by politicians who had the courage to do unpopular things (raise taxes, I presume) rather than trying to please people.
In the previous post I introduced you to The Law of the Nail. A corollary to the Law of the Hammer (“If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail”), the Law of the Nail says,
If you are a nail, and especially if you’ve been pounded a time or two, everything (and everybody) looks like a hammer.
That’s even true when you’re a light bulb, not a hammer. Just watch the video:
Everybody gets banged up by people or by life sooner or later. But sometimes we are faced with situations in which we must work with, lead, or love people who, in nail terminology, are really bent up.
Because you are on the same planet, much less in the same building or room, they don’t trust you. Doesn’t matter whether you have earned their mistrust or not. They perceive, speak, and reason through their woundedness. And as far as they’re concerned, you’re just another hammer, waiting for your chance to pound away at them.
So what do you do with these people? Make their fears come true? Write them off? Get offended? Ignore them?
I’d like to suggest that you have an opportunity to both get the job done (whatever “the job” is) and be an instrument of healing. Here are some ideas: [click to continue…]
It could alter traffic, change work schedules, and send us into bone-chilled terror. When we weren’t busting out laughing.
I’m talking about “The Look.”
Mama copped to it – even called it “The JoAnne Look.”
My most recent encounter with it came last October when we were sitting in the lobby of Providence Hospital waiting for my dad to get a test. Secluded in a waiting area, we could hear somebody on the other side setting up some sort of display by dragging eight-foot tables with an annoying racket. Especially annoying if you had a bad headache, as Mama did.
Okay, I get it. Dickens County (pop. 2,762) is hiring at the local correctional facility in Spur (pop. 1,088).
But is it just me?
Or is there sometimes more than one way to read an invitation?
Wanna join our family? Just keep drinking and driving, Otis. Or just knock your wife around or knock off that store.
We’re an equal opportunity… employer… with benefits. We offer three squares a day, with health and dental as needed. (Or we’ll at least get the local vet to pull that bad tooth.)
Picture a couple of goldfish in a cartoon. Only instead of a fishbowl, they’re holed up in a blender. One looks to the other and says, “The stress here is killing me!”
From a billboard in Ralls, Texas…